loosening ties

Hello people. As I can't blog from home, Im gettin a friend to help me
post this.

Bloody sleepy today, came into class 30mins late and still got the
cheek to fall asleep. Haha. Ok to the main subject today. For the past few
days, Im starting to feel rather distant to almost everyone. Thankfully
I don't feel that way towards my family. It mostly effect my friends
and me. Firstly was my secondary school friends. Hadn't been in contact
with any of them since the end of year 1. Even when I see them online,
we don't chat. Even if we were to engage in a conversation, I wouldn't
even know what to say. Secondly, my classmate/Bestfriend in school,
Munir. Last year in year 1 we use to be soo bloody close. Never a time in
school you see us apart. Until recently, we had 2 new malay classmates.
Of cause we were very happy and excited to expand our small circle of
friend. But it seems that Munir and the other 2 seem to be getting along
far better than with me. Maybe there was a bit of jealousy involve. But
I don't really mind at all coz Im not entirely ignored. Except that now
Im used as a source for them to make fun of. Once again I don't really
mind, but there is a limit to one's patience. So far I've have not
shown any of my unhappiness. As 2 of the Taekwondo tenets says,
SELF-CONTROL and INDOMINABLE SPIRIT. Next comes TKD itself. Im in the committee
and am the assistant team captain. Most of the time, im pretty close to
the committee members. Others have commented that this comm won't make
it good or it's the worst comm ever. But so far we proved them wrong. We
had been working closely together and to what I observe, we had achieve
quite alot lately. Until recently...

Maybe I was blinded. I was too engross being the asst team capt and
trying to blend in with the comm that I may have oversee certain outcomes.
Slowly I can see the comm fall apart. I shan't say much or what is
happening, cause it maybe someone from the committee might be reading and I
don't want any conflict to arise.

But all this doesn't come without its good points, new friendship
arises and old ties have tighten. Today, went home with a certain friend. So
far my impression of him to me was, he was a damn good president(I
guess most of you might have figure him out) and nothing more. Today, my
impression of him changes, He had open himself to me and told me some
pretty personal stuffs. It was the first time the jolly, happy-go-lucky
guy turn into a sensitive and down-to-earth kind of guy. We was really
passionate about his girlfriend and loves his family very much. It was
the first time, I saw him choking back his tears. I really appreciate all
the advise you gave me man and don't worry I won't forget you for as
long as I live thats my promise to you bro.

Haiz I just hope that somewhere down this life journey, my life would
make a good turn. Well everyone will get his or her time or day. I guess
mine's not today.

Today's funniest advise I've gotten was "Hey, get a girlfriend ah"
Haha. Pretty surprise man. Usually people would say study first or wait
till after NS or something else ah. Haha.

Anyway, I guess I'll stop here. Shan't ramble too much. Gd nite poeple
and take care ciao

-blog out-

Stupid home pc

Test test. Fucking hell. In school now and I can blog. I guess it's my computer again. Argh. Gotta go home and fix the problem a.s.a.p

Just finish DC PBIL. It was easy. Do a flow chart at home then come to school. Work out the solution find out the fault in the system and hand in. Easy peasy. At the mean time I guess I'll type my blog in school. So I guess for my regular readers just bear with it can? please. OK gotta go now... bye take care

-blog out-

stupid blogger

Hello people,
something is definately wrong with my blogger. I cant seem to type
anything in the body. I can only type the title. Well but somehow rather i
found an alternate way in typing in my blog. Type it in a notepad first
then copy paste in into the body. But the trick is. I have to be fast
enough. Or else the cursor will change. I bet most of you don't
understand what im saying. Nevermind. Coz you haven face this problem yet.

Anyway, back to my life. A lot, sure has happened since i last blog.
Had a friendly exchange programme with the NUS TKD. Got my ass kicked.
Sorry Sir Vince I guess I Wasn't ready yet.

My MST was held last week. Been studying so I hope I would pull thru.
Because of the new gradin system. Meaning no sub paper, lesser holidays
and lesser study week. We had to make each and every test count. Haiz
hope that I get at least a pass on each paper.

The past few days, old friends keep popping up out of nowhere in
friendster. Old primary schoolmates, secondary schoolmates, even people whom
i dunno but they know me, add me as their friend. Its not like im
complaining but at least leave a message that you are gonna add me. It's not
a guarantee that i'll remember you but at least tell me ur affilation
with me.

Then came a girl. Haha no in fact make it 3 girls. 2 whom I just got to
know thru friendster, kinda have taken a certain liking towards the
both of them. But its too early to tell. 1 is from SP also but she's in
DICT the other is from NP in the Early childhood coz. OK the 3rd girl.
She's kinda an old crush I had while in primary school. Use to hate boys
alot, so she would only hang around with the girls. But somehow she's
different from the rest. (I dunno but everytime "they" always seem
different to me. haha) Well I dunno bout my feelings towards her now. But we
seem to have reached a certain level or mutual understanding between
the both of us. My feelings towards a certain girl is still there. That
is why i cant really decide my feelings towards this new companion.
Anyway, time will tell.

Today wasnt really bad. Wanted to head down to BBDC to book my basic
theory but office hours close at 12. I reached there at 2 so my trip was
kinda wasted. Then went home slept the whole afternoon. Im such a
pig!!! Watched a little tv then now here i am tryin to solve my blog
problem.

Olrite its almost 2am. I guess i'll stop now and head to bed. Tml might be playing soccer with Munir and Muhammad.
ciao gd nite

-blog out-

haiz

Halo people....

Started my revisions already, coz next week is my MST week. Am feeling a little nervous though. Scared that i wouldnt do well. Yesterday studied with Munir, Bani and Muhd at SP's plaza. Studied then played a little magic trick during breaks in between. All i can say is that Bani is da man. He's juz like david blaine. His tricks were mind boggling haha. Beg him to teach us some of his tricks but being the true magician he is, he decline. "A magician never reveals his secrets".

Head to the TKD club meeting for awhile. Then went back the studying, couldnt really train with my head mentally tired and full of formulaes and stuffs. Went off at around 9 plus head down to the training ground for a 2nd meeting then head off to clementi with my bruddas. Had our usual drinks and mash potatoes. Talk for awhile then headed home.

Last night was one of those nights again. haiz.... Where by i couldnt sleep and my mind was constantly thinking. Showered then watched a little tv. My whole family had gone to bed, so i was alone outside. Wanted to play a little xbox but was getting bored of the games. Was channel hopping when I stopped at HBO. It was playing this movie "Two weeks noticed". Wasn't really keen at watchin at all but since there werent any other good shows i stuck to it. Surprisingly, I seem to enjoy the show. Sandra bullock and Hugh grant make a pretty good pair. The movie was funny and a little romance here and there. Then my mind started thinking once again. Somehow rather i kinda link the movie to what im feeling right now. I dunnno how i do it but it happens all the time even with songs. Its like you watch or listen to this particular song for so many times but you never really paid any attention to it but suddenly for one you happen to listen to the lyrics and woalah!!! it suits your predicament. Haiz so yeah was reminded again!!!! of a certain past.

Can't really help it. I dunno why. Maybe i've fallen too deeply. Been tryin to distract myself by thinking about other possiblilities but it will only work for a while, afterwhich i will think about her again. damn. Is this what they call Love Suicide? Maybe. So many advises i've receive, so many help i had received all in vain. Feel like getting down on my knees and beg her. But she belongs to another. Well her heart that is.

Recently i've been, hopelessly reaching. Out for this girl, whose out of this world. Believe me. She's got a boyfriend(I hope not)
who drives me round the bend.
Coz he's 23(i dunno how old ah juz guess), He's in the marines(not exactly marines, NS)
He'll kill me(gulp!!!).
So many nights now(make it every night),
I find myself thinkin about her right now.

Coz obviously, she out of my league,(she's smart, im not)
how can i win she keeps dragging me in(help!!!!),
and i know i,
never will be good enough for her(Haiz......)

I dunno what to do. Haiz.... well gotta go now. Will be going off for a family movie. Gotta run bye..... take care people

-blog out-