19 years and counting....

"My presents this year"

• An Adidas t-shirt from Syarah, my cute lil sis
• Levis cap from my cousins
• 30 pounds from my aunt and uncle in london
• Adidas TKD shoes and Nokia 6230 from Mom
• FX creation wallet from Syaz and Meera me lovely sisters
• G-shock watch from my dad

Hey guys another year has passed and another year older. Hopefully this year would be a good year for me. OK first things first. I'm 19 years old now. 2 more years and I'm eligible to watch R21 shows ahahaha. Juz kidding. Almost coming to the end of my teenage years. Looking back at my yesteryears. All those fond memories. The process of growing up. Look through my photo albums. When I was a wee wee little baby boy (Kinda cute I must say), then my kindergarten days, The high flyer, always fighting for top 3 in class. Then came my primary school days. Honestly speaking my primary school days were my not say worst but my bad looking days. With those dorky glasses and "botak" head look. It was terrible i say oh and did I mention I was fat too. But at that time, I was still too young to worry about my looks anyway. Then in secondary school I started to make more attention to my appearence. Mainly for presentation and partly to attract the opposite sex (haha) and did I succeed? Well that's a different story. Then I graduated, now I'm in my polytechnic days. My oh my I did change a lot in terms of physically that is but deep down inside Im still the same shy little boy everyone knew and in terms of Mentally well lets say that was 1 of my major changes.

As they say the older you get the wiser you become and Its kinda true. Besides the knowledge part. I became more street smart, more understanding towards the world and people around me. Yesterday, had a conversation with my uncle whose all the way in london. Discuss about my life and he told me some secrets about his past. It seems we aren't that different afterall. Relate to him my current situation. He said something which actually gave me confidence. "It's their lost. Not yours(meaning me)" For all those relationships that I had lost, he made me realise that It wasn't my lost to lose the the girl but instead it was theirs for rejecting me. Not to say that Im boasting about myself( one of my new year resolutions this year is to remain humble) but lets face it. In our malay community there are not many guys with good qualities. What good qualities you may ask? well like, having very very close ties with their families, striving well in their studies, maintaining a good clean record, religous oriented and many more.

You don't see me smoke do you? A lot of my friends do but despite the constant peer pressure I still refrain myself from puffing away. Drugs? no way. Well maybe I was guilty of small stuffs like stealing, lying, scolding vulgarities but who doesnt? Everyone is bound to have lied once even saying the F word once in awhile. It's all part of growing up. This year my birthday wish is slightly different. No more have I concentrate only on myself but on the benefits of others. One of my wish was to see the the rise of the malay community. I hope in the future, I can see more malay holding high rankings in the army, air force, navy, police and everywhere. No more I wanna see malay kids, teenagers my age dropping out of school, committing undesirable acts and becoming the slums of the community. Aren't they ashame of themsleves? I dunno but I am ashame. Because it concerns me also. These kids i realise, aint stupid. They are actually quite smart but because of bad influnce and the lack of guidance from parents, they tend to flop.

I am thankful for having such great parents. It was and is the best present any child could ever get and I thank god for it. So this year looks like Im celebrating "alone" again. Not alone as in no one to celebrate with but "alone" in the sense that not havin a significant other. Maybe not this year. There is still next year. So yeah another year older and I still feel the same. haha.

Nah im making a point to change to a much more better me. oh yeah and I more other thing. I guess my love for her is ending now on the 13th of January 2005. take note of "January" coz that the title of the song Im gonna sing on my birthday....

Januari (GLEN)

Berat bebanku

Meninggalkanmu

Separuh nafas jiwaku

Sirna...

Bukan salahmu

Apa dayaku

Mungkin benar cinta sejati

Tak berpihak

Pada kita

Chorus:

Kasihku

Sampai disini kisah kita

Jangan tangisi keadaannya

Bukan karena kita berbeda

Dengarkan

Dengarkan lagu.....lagu ini

Melodi rintihan hati ini

Kisah kita berakhir di Januari

Selamat tinggal kisah sejatiku

Wow....pergilah

Thats all folks...... HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY SYAFIQ!!!!

-blog out-